Walking

My aunt wrote a book - entitled Walking..

Besides, my obvious personal bias - I would strongly recommend it. For me it captures a lot of growing up, particularly in the Caribbean, and everything that goes along that. I wrote a review for this book. I thought might as well put it here:

Josephine stood, her mouth agape, unable to sing, incapable of saying goodbye. Why now? Wasn't she older this time? In life, we will always face moments of hopelessness, times where we are a prisoner in our own body, lacking direction and inspiration. Walking challenges us, through the eyes of Josephine, to confront our own demons.

As Josephine faces each new challenge, moving from a "fresh" little girl, to precocious teen, to anxious adult, she is not more perfect, but more perceptive. Each relationship, each challenge, opens but one more petal of the flower whose boldness and beauty become more and more apparent. Little Josephine was never so little. Walking touches the soul, and speaks to the uncertainty that is the passage of life. When it is a struggle to keep one foot in front of the other, when our heart is heavy, Josephine encourages us through her life, to lift our head and see where we are going. Above all else, when the road is darkest, we gain a silent strength that we will only see later.

Josephine is most beautiful for her undying spirit. It is the best of us. Sometimes hidden, but never lost, it is or catalyst. It is our identity, our bridge between action and achievement. Adversity is its sustenance. Most of all, Walking captures this intrinsic, often spontaneous element, that unifies and defines us. Teen Josephine says it best, " Like father, like daughter, I choosing self no matter what… I will do what I have to do, right? No matter how hard it make my life."

In 2 deep

That's a big damian marley tune

A new year does not mean new changes. Even if one might pick a grand moment to signify grand change, in actuality – that is not the case. Time is truly relative and special occasions are really artificial. No moment is truly different than the next. 2008 is teaching me this the hard way.

I think the road to unhappiness is paved with good intentions.

I am suffering a 2007 hangover. I seem to be digging to get out of a hole. The more I resolve to find happiness and peace, the further I fall. I feel like the people around me look at me and don’t see much. Then again, if I was to look at myself, maybe I would think the same. I am struggling.

It is hard. I remember my first blog entry – activity is not achievement. Ambition and potential are really just words. I am hoping I can wake up from this dream. I cannot go on being Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. What is happening in my head needs to happen in my life. I am tired of being a disappointment, or feeling like a disappointment to the people around me.

Why am I fighting to live, if I'm just living to fight
Why am I trying to see, when there ain’t nothing in sight
Why I am I trying to give, when no one gives me a try
Why am I dying to live, if I'm just living to die

I think I am too young to be feeling this old